Our Couples Therapy Services

Step 1: Getting Started with Couples Therapy

Welcome to Your First Step

Taking the decision to seek couples therapy is a meaningful step toward healing and strengthening your relationship. At Turning Tides Counselling & Life Coaching, we understand that reaching out can feel vulnerable. This first step is about connection, understanding, and beginning to build a path forward together.

What Happens During Initial Contact

When you first reach out to us, you are not committing to anything beyond a conversation. We offer a complimentary 20-minute consultation where you and your partner can discuss what has brought you here. This is your opportunity to ask questions, share your concerns, and get a sense of how we work.

During this initial conversation, Kotone Frankowski will listen to your story without judgment. She will help you understand what couples therapy looks like and whether our approach feels right for you both. Many couples find this conversation itself to be helpful, as it opens space for dialogue in a supported environment.

How to Book Your Consultation

Scheduling your free 20-minute consultation is simple. You have several options to connect with us:

• Visit our online booking platform at https://www.colib.io/booking/turning-tides-coaching-counselling
• Call us at 778-321-6058
• Email info@turningtidestoday.com with your preferred times
• Send us a message on WhatsApp at 778-321-6058

We serve couples throughout British Columbia, including Metro Vancouver, Vancouver Island, the Fraser Valley, Interior BC, and beyond. Whether you prefer to meet online or in person in Vancouver, we can accommodate your needs.

What to Expect in Your First Session

Once you move forward with couples therapy, your first full session will be 50 minutes. This is where the real work begins.

Kotone creates a warm, safe space where both partners feel genuinely heard. She will ask about your relationship journey, how you met, what has brought you together, and what challenges you are facing now. This might include communication difficulties, trust concerns, emotional disconnection, or the impact of past experiences on your relationship.

Because Kotone specializes in care informed by trauma research and emotional healing, she pays attention to how past experiences shape your current patterns. This is not about blame. It is about understanding the roots of what you are experiencing so you can move forward with compassion for each other.

In this first session, you will also learn about the therapeutic approaches we use. These include Internal Family Systems (IFS), somatic approaches that work with your body's wisdom, cognitive behavioural methods, acceptance and commitment therapy, and dialectical behaviour therapy. Kotone tailors these to what your relationship needs.

Frequently Asked Questions

Do we both have to be ready for therapy?

It helps when both partners are willing to show up and engage. Sometimes one person is more hesitant than the other, and that is okay. The first conversation can help clarify what therapy offers and address any concerns either of you might have.

What if we have different goals for therapy?

Many couples come in with different perspectives on what needs to change. This is actually very common and is something we work through together. The early sessions help clarify shared goals while honouring each person's needs.

How long does couples therapy usually take?

This varies depending on what you are working through and your goals. Some couples benefit from ongoing support, while others work through specific challenges over several months. We will discuss this with you as we go.

Is what we share confidential?

Yes. Everything shared in sessions is confidential. The only exceptions are situations involving safety concerns, which we would discuss with you directly.

What if we decide therapy is not right for us?

That is completely your choice. We want you to feel comfortable and supported. If at any point you have concerns about the fit or the process, we encourage you to discuss this openly.

Do you work with different types of relationships?

Yes. We work with monogamous couples, polyamorous relationships, and all forms of partnerships. Our approach is inclusive and affirming of diverse relationship structures.

Can we do sessions online?

Absolutely. All our couples therapy sessions are conducted online through secure platforms. This means you can participate from wherever you are most comfortable.

What about insurance coverage?

Coverage may be available based on your individual policy with providers such as Canada Life, Green Shield Canada, Manulife, SunLife, and Pacific Blue Cross. We recommend checking with your provider to confirm what is covered. We accept payment by Visa, Mastercard, and PayPal.

What Makes Turning Tides Different

Our couples therapy services serving all of British Columbia are grounded in care informed by trauma research. This means we understand how past experiences shape the way you relate to each other. We do not simply teach communication skills. We help you understand the deeper patterns and heal together.

Kotone brings over five years of experience working with couples navigating relationship challenges, emotional disconnection, and the impact of trauma on partnerships. She holds certification from Evergreen Certifications and is a Registered Therapeutic Counsellor with the Association of Cooperative Counselling Therapists of Canada.

We create a space where both of you feel safe, respected, and genuinely understood. This is where real change becomes possible.

Taking the Next Step

You are ready to begin whenever you feel ready. There is no perfect time, only the time you choose to prioritize your relationship and your healing.

Book your free 20-minute consultation today through our online booking platform, or reach out directly by phone or email. We look forward to meeting you both and supporting your journey toward a stronger, more connected relationship.

Contact Information

Turning Tides Counselling & Life Coaching

1451 Burnaby Street, Vancouver, BC V6G 1W6

Phone: 778-321-6058

Email: info@turningtidestoday.com

WhatsApp: 778-321-6058

Website: www.turningtidestoday.com

Online Booking: https://www.colib.io/booking/turning-tides-coaching-counselling

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Step 2: Getting to Know Each Other and Setting Your Direction

Welcome to Step 2 of your couples therapy journey at Turning Tides Counselling & Life Coaching. This is where we move beyond the initial conversation and begin building the foundation for meaningful change in your relationship. During this phase, we focus on understanding your unique story as a couple, exploring what matters most to you both, and creating a clear roadmap for the work ahead.

What Happens in Step 2

Your first full session together is designed to be collaborative and deeply personal. Rather than feeling like a clinical interview, this time allows us to truly understand your relationship, the challenges you're facing, and the strengths you already possess. Kotone will guide you both through conversations that help us all see the bigger picture of your partnership.

During these initial sessions, we explore several important areas:

• How you met and what drew you together
• The patterns of connection and disconnection you've noticed over time
• Specific challenges or conflicts that brought you to therapy
• How past experiences and trauma, if relevant, may be affecting your relationship now
• What each of you hopes will be different as a result of working together
• Your individual strengths and the strengths you bring to your partnership

Our Approach to Understanding Your Relationship

We use a conversational, reflective approach rather than formal questionnaires or clinical assessments. Think of it as an in-depth conversation where we listen carefully to both of your perspectives. We ask thoughtful questions that help us understand not just what's happening between you, but why it matters and what it means to each of you.

If trauma or past emotional wounds are relevant to your relationship dynamics, we approach these conversations with care and sensitivity. Our approach is informed by research on how trauma affects relationships, and we create safety as we explore these tender areas together.

Collaborative Goal Setting

One of the most important parts of Step 2 is working together to define what success looks like for your relationship. This isn't about us telling you what needs to change. Instead, we facilitate a conversation where you both articulate your hopes and desires for your partnership.

Your goals might include things like:

• Feeling more emotionally connected to each other
• Communicating more effectively during disagreements
• Rebuilding trust after a difficult period
• Understanding each other's emotional needs more deeply
• Navigating a major life transition together
• Healing from the impact of past trauma on your relationship

These goals become the compass for our work together. We return to them regularly to ensure we're moving in the direction that matters most to you both.

What to Bring and How to Prepare

To make the most of your initial sessions, here's a helpful preparation checklist:

Before Your First Session	What This Helps With
Think about your relationship timeline. When did you meet? What were the good times? When did things shift?	Helps us understand the context and history of your partnership
Consider what brought you to therapy right now. What's the main thing you want to address?	Allows us to focus on what matters most to you both
Reflect on what you hope will be different. What would feel like progress to you?	Helps us set meaningful, achievable goals together
Bring any relevant background information, such as significant life events or challenges you've faced together	Gives us a fuller picture of your journey as a couple
Come with openness and a willingness to be honest, even about difficult feelings	Creates the safety and trust needed for real change to happen
Have your insurance information available if you plan to submit claims	Helps us support you with documentation for coverage that may be available based on your individual policy

Understanding Our Intake Process

The intake process simply means the time we spend getting to know you. It's not a test or evaluation. It's an opportunity for us to listen, learn, and begin building trust with you both.

During your first sessions, we use conversations and reflections to understand your relationship dynamics. We might ask you to share your perspective on a particular conflict, or we might invite you both to reflect on what you notice about how you interact during difficult moments. These reflections help us see patterns and understand what's really driving the challenges you're facing.

We also pay attention to your individual emotional needs and how they show up in your relationship. If one or both of you have experienced trauma, we explore how that might be affecting your ability to feel safe and connected with each other. This understanding is crucial because healing your relationship often involves healing individual wounds as well.

Our Therapeutic Approach

Our work with couples is grounded in approaches that have been proven to help relationships heal and strengthen. We use methods informed by Internal Family Systems, which helps us understand the different parts of ourselves that show up in relationships. We also draw on cognitive and behavioural approaches, acceptance and commitment therapy, and somatic techniques that help you both feel more grounded and present with each other.

Everything we do is informed by trauma research and care. This means we recognise that past hurts, whether from your relationship or from earlier in your lives, can affect how you connect now. We work gently and collaboratively to help you both feel safer and more secure together.

Addressing Common Concerns About Step 2

Will I have to share everything about my past? No. You share what feels right for you. We create safety first, and you control the pace of what you reveal. If there are things that are relevant to your relationship, we'll explore them together at a pace that works for you both.

What if my partner and I have different goals for therapy? This is actually quite common, and it's valuable information. Our role is to help you both understand each other's hopes and find common ground. Often, what seems like conflicting goals actually reflects deeper needs that can be honoured together.

How long does Step 2 take? Most couples spend one to three sessions in this phase, depending on the complexity of your situation and how much we need to understand before moving forward. Each session is 50 minutes, which gives us meaningful time to explore and connect.

What if I'm not sure about therapy yet? That's completely understandable. We offer a free 20-minute consultation where you can ask questions, learn more about how we work, and decide if this feels like the right fit for you. There's no pressure, and this conversation can help you feel more confident about taking this step.

How do you handle sensitive topics like infidelity or trauma? With care and respect. We create a safe container where difficult truths can be spoken and heard. Our training in trauma informed care means we know how to help you both process these experiences without retraumatising either of you. We move at a pace that feels manageable, and we focus on understanding and healing rather than blame.

What Happens After Step 2

Once we've completed the initial sessions and have a clear understanding of your relationship and your goals, we move into the active therapy phase. You'll have a sense of what to expect, how we'll work together, and what changes you might begin to notice. We'll also have established a strong foundation of trust and collaboration that supports the deeper work ahead.

Between sessions, we're available for email support if questions or concerns arise. This helps you feel supported throughout your healing journey, not just during your time in the office.

Ready to Begin?

Step 2 is an invitation to be truly seen and understood as a couple. It's a chance to articulate what matters most to you both and to begin the process of reconnection and healing. Our role is to listen, to guide, and to help you both move toward the relationship you want.

If you have questions about what to expect or if you'd like to schedule your free 20-minute consultation, we're here to help. You can reach out through our online booking platform, or contact us directly to discuss what feels right for you.

Ready to take the next step? Book your consultation or first session through our online booking platform at https://www.colib.io/booking/turning-tides-coaching-counselling. Our couples therapy services serving all of British Columbia are designed to meet you where you are and help you both move toward greater connection, understanding, and healing.

Step 3: Your Couples Therapy Journey Continues

Moving Forward Together: What Happens in Your Ongoing Sessions

You've taken the first steps. You've had your initial conversations with us. Now comes the meaningful work of healing and reconnection. Step 3 is where your couples therapy truly deepens, where patterns shift, and where you both begin to experience real change in how you relate to one another.

What Your Sessions Will Look Like

Each session is 50 minutes of focused, collaborative time dedicated entirely to your relationship. Here's how we structure this time together.

Session Component	What Happens	Your Role
Opening Check-In(5-10 minutes)	We begin by seeing how you're both doing. You'll share what's been on your hearts since we last met. This helps us understand your emotional state and what feels most pressing right now.	Be honest about what you're feeling. There's no right answer here, only your truth.
Reflecting on Your Week(10 minutes)	We look at the practices and conversations you've engaged in between sessions. What felt good? What was challenging? We celebrate the wins and gently explore the obstacles.	Share what you actually experienced, not what you think we want to hear. This feedback shapes how we move forward.
Understanding Your Patterns(15-20 minutes)	Together, we explore the cycles that keep showing up in your relationship. We look beneath the surface behaviours to understand the emotions and needs driving them. This is where healing begins.	Stay curious about yourself and your partner. Notice what feelings come up. Let yourself be vulnerable.
Practising New Ways of Connecting(15-20 minutes)	We guide you through conversations and exercises right here in the session. You'll practise expressing yourselves differently. You'll learn to listen in new ways. We support you as you try these new approaches together.	Be willing to try something different, even if it feels uncomfortable at first. This is practice, not performance.
Building Your Skills(10-15 minutes)	We introduce techniques grounded in evidence-based approaches. These might include ways to calm your nervous system, methods for expressing needs clearly, or practices for deepening emotional safety and trust.	Ask questions. Let us know what resonates with you and what doesn't. We adapt based on what feels right for your relationship.
Your Homework for the Week(10 minutes)	We collaboratively design practices for you to do together at home. These are tailored to your specific situation and goals. They're designed to be doable, meaningful, and supportive of the work we're doing in sessions.	Commit to what feels realistic. It's better to do a little consistently than to overcommit and feel frustrated.
Closing and Looking Ahead(5 minutes)	We summarise what you've discovered today. We confirm your next appointment. We remind you both of your capacity to move through this together.	Take a moment to acknowledge the courage it takes to do this work. You're both showing up for your relationship.

The Therapeutic Approaches We Use

Our work draws from several evidence-based methods, all woven together to support your unique relationship. Here's what you can expect.

Internal Family Systems Informed Care

We help you understand the different parts of yourself that show up in your relationship. Sometimes you react from a protective part. Sometimes you withdraw from a hurt part. By understanding these parts with compassion, you both gain insight into why you do what you do. This creates space for genuine understanding between you.

Somatic and Body-Centred Approaches

Trauma and relationship pain live in our bodies, not just our minds. We help you notice what's happening in your nervous system. We teach you grounding techniques. We help you recognise when you're moving into fight, flight, or freeze responses. As you become aware of these patterns, you gain the ability to choose differently.

Cognitive and Thought-Pattern Work

Sometimes the stories we tell ourselves about our partner or our relationship keep us stuck. We gently explore these thoughts together. We ask whether they're actually true. We help you develop more balanced, compassionate ways of thinking about each other and your situation.

Acceptance and Commitment Approaches

Not everything can be fixed or changed. Some differences between you are real. Rather than fighting against what is, we help you both clarify what truly matters to you as a couple. Then we support you in building a relationship aligned with those values, even in the presence of challenges.

Compassion-Focused and Emotion-Centred Methods

At the heart of this work is helping you both feel safe enough to be vulnerable. We create an environment where emotions are welcomed, not judged. We help you understand what your emotions are telling you. We support you in expressing needs and longings to each other with honesty and tenderness.

What We'll Work On Together

Your specific focus will depend on what brought you to couples therapy. Here are common areas we address.

• Communication and Conflict: Learning to express yourselves without blame. Understanding how to listen to your partner's perspective, even when you disagree. Finding ways through conflict that bring you closer rather than further apart.
• Trust and Safety: Rebuilding trust if it's been broken. Creating emotional safety so both of you feel secure enough to be authentic. Healing from past hurts that linger in your relationship.
• Intimacy and Connection: Rekindling emotional closeness. Understanding what intimacy means to each of you. Creating space for physical affection and vulnerability.
• Life Transitions: Supporting each other through major changes like parenthood, career shifts, loss, or health challenges. Ensuring you're navigating these transitions as a team.
• Unresolved Trauma: If either or both of you carry trauma from past relationships or life experiences, we help you understand how that shows up in your current relationship. We support healing so old wounds don't continue to affect your connection.
• Values and Life Purpose: Exploring what matters most to each of you. Ensuring your relationship supports both of your individual growth and shared dreams.

Your Homework: Practices Between Sessions

The real transformation happens between sessions, in your everyday life together. Here's what we typically ask of you.

Reflective Journaling

Each of you keeps a personal journal where you notice moments of connection and moments of tension. You write about what you're feeling, what triggered you, what you needed in that moment. This builds self-awareness. When you understand yourself better, you can communicate more clearly to your partner.

Scheduled Connection Time

We ask you to set aside 15 to 30 minutes each week, distraction-free, just for each other. This might be a walk, a cup of tea together, or a conversation. During this time, you practise the communication skills we've worked on in sessions. You share what's really going on inside. You listen to understand, not to fix or defend.

Emotion Sharing Exercises

You'll practise naming and expressing your feelings to each other using the language we've developed together. Instead of 'You always do this,' you might say, 'When that happens, I feel scared because I worry you don't care.' This shifts the dynamic from blame to vulnerability.

Nervous System Regulation Practices

We teach you breathing techniques, grounding exercises, and mindfulness practices you can do individually or together. These help you stay calm during difficult conversations. They help you move out of reactive states into more thoughtful, connected responses.

Collaborative Problem-Solving

You'll identify one recurring issue and work through it together using the framework we've created. This might be about household responsibilities, parenting approaches, finances, or time together. The goal isn't necessarily to solve the problem perfectly. It's to practise working as a team.

Appreciation and Gratitude Practices

Each week, you share one thing you appreciate about your partner. One moment when they showed up for you. One quality you admire. This isn't forced or fake. It's about training your brain to notice the good alongside the challenging.

Reading and Reflection

We might recommend articles, book chapters, or other resources that speak to what you're working on. You read individually and then discuss together. This deepens your understanding and gives you language for conversations you're having.

How We Track Your Progress

We don't use formal questionnaires or clinical assessments. Instead, we track progress through ongoing conversation and reflection.

Session-to-Session Conversations

Each time we meet, we ask you directly: What's shifted? What feels different? Where are you noticing more connection? These conversations reveal the real changes happening in your relationship.

Post-Session Follow-Up Emails

After each session, we send you a brief email summarising what we discussed and what you're working on. This keeps the insights fresh and gives you something to reference during the week. You can reply with questions or reflections.

Milestone Check-Ins

Every few sessions, we pause to reflect on the bigger picture. Are you communicating differently? Do you feel safer with each other? Are you moving toward the relationship you want? We celebrate progress and adjust our approach if needed.

Your Own Observations

The most important measure of progress is what you notice. Are you arguing less? Laughing more? Feeling more understood? Trusting each other more? These lived experiences matter far more than any formal measurement.

Between-Session Support

You're not alone between sessions. We're here to support you.

Email Support

If something comes up during the week and you need guidance, you can email us. We respond within 24 to 48 hours with support, perspective, or suggestions for how to handle what's happening.

Crisis Support

If either of you is in crisis or experiencing thoughts of harm, we provide resources and guidance immediately. We can help you access emergency support if needed.

Flexible Scheduling

Life happens. If you need to reschedule or need an extra session during a particularly challenging time, we work with you to make that possible.

What Makes This Work

Couples therapy is most effective when both partners are genuinely committed to the process. You don't have to be perfect. You don't have to agree on everything. You do need to show up with honesty, willingness, and hope.

You'll likely feel uncomfortable at times. Growth requires that. You might cry. You might feel frustrated. You might have breakthroughs that shift everything. All of this is part of the journey.

Our role is to create safety, offer perspective, teach new skills, and support you both in moving toward the relationship you want. Your role is to bring your authentic selves, to try new approaches, and to stay committed even when it's hard.

This is collaborative work. You're not passive recipients of therapy. You're active partners in your own healing and your relationship's transformation.

Ready to Begin?

Step 3 is where the real work unfolds. It's where you both discover that change is possible. It's where you learn to relate to each other differently. It's where your relationship can become what you've both been hoping for.

Our couples therapy services are available across British Columbia, delivered online to ensure accessibility and convenience for you both. Whether you're in Vancouver, Victoria, Kelowna, or anywhere else in the province, we're here to support your relationship's healing and growth.

If you're ready to move forward, we invite you to book your first session with us. You can schedule online at https://www.colib.io/booking/turning-tides-coaching-counselling, or reach out to us directly at info@turningtidestoday.com or 778-321-6058.

Your relationship is worth this investment. You're both worth it.

Step 4: Completion and Ongoing Support

You've reached an important milestone. This step focuses on recognizing your progress, planning for the future, and ensuring you have the support you need as you move forward together.

Evaluating Your Progress

By now, you and your partner have likely noticed real shifts in how you communicate, connect, and navigate challenges together. These changes didn't happen overnight. They came from your commitment to showing up, being vulnerable, and choosing each other repeatedly.

During this phase, we'll reflect on what has transformed:

• How your conversations feel different
• The ways you handle disagreements with more compassion
• Moments of genuine connection that feel easier to access
• Your individual growth and how it strengthens your partnership
• The tools you've learned and how naturally they're becoming part of your daily life

This reflection isn't just about looking back. It's about recognizing your own resilience and the work you've both invested in healing your relationship.

Signs You May Be Ready for Completion

Every couple's journey is unique. There's no fixed timeline. However, you might be approaching completion when:

• You feel equipped to handle conflicts with more understanding and less reactivity
• You're communicating your needs and listening to your partner's needs more consistently
• Moments of disconnection feel less frightening because you know how to reconnect
• You've processed significant trauma or relationship wounds that were affecting your bond
• You're implementing the tools you've learned without needing to think about them
• You feel hopeful about your future together
• You're ready to navigate challenges more independently while knowing support is available

Readiness for completion is something we explore together. There's no rush, and there's no judgment if you need more time.

Maintenance Strategies for Long-Term Success

Completing couples therapy doesn't mean your work together ends. It means you're moving into a new phase where you become your own guides, supported by the foundation you've built.

Regular Connection Rituals

Maintain the practices that have helped you most. This might include weekly check-ins where you share what's on your hearts, monthly dates where you reconnect without distractions, or daily moments of gratitude for each other.

Revisiting Your Tools

The techniques you've learned remain available to you. When stress rises or old patterns start to surface, you have concrete ways to pause, reflect, and respond with intention rather than react from fear.

Staying Aware of Triggers

You've learned what activates you both. Continue noticing these moments with curiosity rather than judgment. Understanding your triggers becomes easier with practice, and you'll find yourselves responding differently over time.

Prioritizing Your Individual Healing

Your relationship is strongest when you're both tending to your own wellbeing. This might mean continuing individual therapy, engaging in practices that ground you, or pursuing personal goals that matter to you.

Celebrating Your Wins

Notice the small victories. The conversation that went well. The moment you chose patience. The time you asked for what you needed. These moments matter. They're evidence of your growth.

Ongoing Support Options

Completing structured couples therapy doesn't mean you're on your own. Our couples therapy serving all of British Columbia offers flexible ongoing support tailored to your needs.

Maintenance Sessions

Many couples benefit from occasional check-in sessions, perhaps monthly or quarterly. These sessions help you stay on track, address new challenges before they become patterns, and celebrate the progress you're maintaining.

Between-Session Email Support

If questions arise or you need guidance between sessions, you can reach out via email. This keeps you connected to support without requiring a full session.

Returning When Life Shifts

Major life transitions, new stressors, or unresolved patterns sometimes surface after therapy concludes. You're always welcome to return for a few sessions to navigate these moments together. There's no shame in this. It's actually a sign of wisdom and commitment to your relationship.

Crisis Support

If you find yourselves in acute distress, we can schedule sessions more frequently to help you through the crisis and rebuild stability together.

What Completion Looks Like

Completing couples therapy means you're leaving with more than memories of your sessions. You're leaving with:

• A deeper understanding of each other's inner worlds
• Practical skills for communication and conflict resolution
• Awareness of your patterns and the ability to interrupt them
• Healing from wounds that were affecting your connection
• Confidence that you can navigate future challenges together
• A sense of partnership that feels safer, more authentic, and more resilient

This is real transformation. You've done the work. You've shown up for each other. You've been willing to be vulnerable and to grow.

Your Next Steps

As you prepare to complete or transition to maintenance support, we'll discuss what feels right for you both. Some couples benefit from a final session dedicated to reflection and planning. Others prefer to gradually space out sessions. There's no single right way.

What matters is that you feel supported, confident, and connected as you move forward.

Celebrating Your Journey

Take a moment to acknowledge where you started and where you are now. The vulnerability it took to seek help. The courage it took to stay engaged even when things felt difficult. The love that brought you to this work in the first place.

That love is still there. It's just clearer now. Stronger. More grounded in understanding and compassion.

You've built something worth protecting. And you know how to do it.

Ready to Begin or Continue Your Journey?

Whether you're completing your couples therapy or exploring what ongoing support might look like, we're here to help. Our couples therapy services are available online and serve clients throughout British Columbia.

Book your next session or a consultation to discuss your path forward through our online booking platform at https://www.colib.io/booking/turning-tides-coaching-counselling

You can also reach out directly to discuss your specific needs and what completion or ongoing support might look like for your relationship.